Me Time

My last post is a picture of Greta Garbo, the woman famous for her line "I want to be alone." Just of late, I have craved time alone. Time with no plans, just me, maybe some wine, maybe a book or maybe just nothing. It is interesting that I crave this so much, because those who know me, know that I am hardly a shrinking violet. I guess I am probably fairly intense in a face to face situation. "Chatty" is a word my partner politely describes me as. And I am. I rarely shut up. Sometimes, I should shut up long before I do, because sometimes I say stupid stuff, just because my mouth happens to be open with words tumbling out and I struggle to stop them before they do. Often these situations are a defence mechanism to hide the fact that I am feeling uncomfortable or ignorant or intimidated.
I guess having always been a talkative person, I have kind of developed a bit of a reputation for it and I guess I feel an unconcious need to uphold that reputation. If ever I go to a social event and I am not being "chatty", people start to panic and think I am ill, or mad, or bored, or upset. Generally speaking, if I am like that, it is because I have reached the point that I am currently at. I need some time out. I need time to not talk, to regroup and think, to drink some tea, read a book, watch a film, clean out my third drawer, go walking in a picturesque reserve or write a cathartic blog about spending time alone.
Don't worry, I'll be back with my infamous ability to "talk underwater with a mouthful of marbles" as my mother so affectionately described it!

Down time

I understand this woman.

Day 5 - Experiment Complete

Well, I am pleased to say that my 5 day concious desicion to enjoy my work has paid off. I've been more motivated and organised and felt more 'useful' since making the desicion to enjoy work.
Interestingly, on the Friday, I found out that I am going to be amping up the finance side of things in my job, which frankly, is a little depressing because finance is not my forte and even less so, given that it will also involve the new computer system which scares the pants off me, but I am going to put every effort in to see this as an opportunity to learn a new skill.
Hopefully, I'll be able to keep up my positive perspective for the coming weeks!

Day 4

I struggled to put my finger on something I actually 'like' about my work today, but suffice to say, I had a good day. While I was sipping my coffee (see Tuesday's perk), my friendly colleague asked if I would like to go out to one of our hospital sites with her for a bit of a meet and greet. So I got an hour out of the office and an opportunity to learn a bit about some of our claims processes.
One thing I thought of yesterday is that my attitude this week has not been much different from my first week on the job. I came in, positive attitude, determined to make the best of this new opportunity and determined to learn. I think learning is the key here. When we stop learning, we stop....period! I had stopped seeking out new challenges (not consciously - it just happened) and that is why I was starting to get so disillusioned with work.
One more day - if I can do this for a week, surely I can maintain it for a year!

Day 3

Well, day 3, being Wednesday, that is easy. Wednesday's I get to knock off at 12! Flexible work arrangements! What's not to like!?

Day 2

Ok, day two of liking my job. All going well. Today's positive, apart from keeping really busy and finishing my filing (there is something about completing mundane tasks that is so satisfying!) I decided that today's positive is the coffee machine. I love a good coffee in the morning and my work has a really good quality coffee machine, so I can have my latte for free, saving me $20 a week!

A 5 Day Experiment - Day 1

So, it's no secret. From around 8am to 4:45pm Monday to Friday (save for about 30 minutes in the middle of the day and from 12 on Wednesdays) there are a million places I would rather be. I haven't really enjoyed my job for about 6 months now. This morning, while walking to work, for some reason, I had a little spring in my step. Maybe it was the result of a restful and satisfying weekend, or serendipitously running into a friend en route from the train station, either way, I felt....positive! So with that positive mind set, I made a desicion. I am going to make every effort to enjoy my job this week. If I can find something positive to say about my work every day this week, I have a sporting chance of being able to look back at this week and remind myself of what is good about my job and why I haven't leapt out the window yet. Really, it CAN'T be that bad!

So my positive thing today: my boss has been on leave for a week and a bit and went to Hong Kong on holiday. Today, he gave me a really nice little gift that he bought over there. I have a very thoughtful and kind boss. That is a lot more than I can say about other places I have worked and places that many of my friends work. The people that we work with can make or break the whole 'going to work' experience and I am pleased to say that my current job is made all the more bareable by my 2 colleauges.