Settling

In the last 12 years, counting my move to from Darwin to Adelaide, I have moved 6 times. Interestingly, this most recent move, the move from renting to owning, has been my most stressful and difficult. It’s a complex combination of things that has made me feel unsettled this time around, partly due to a number of things going on in our lives – Andy’s new job means he works odd hours, we have some days where I am asleep when he gets home and he is asleep when I leave – this accounts for entire weeks when we really don’t have a chance to really talk to each other about mundane, household stuff, let alone interesting deep and meaningful chats.
We’ve had 2 family deaths. Andy’s uncle passed away after a brave yet heartbreaking battle with Mesothelioma, followed not 3 weeks later by his Grandmother, who had been battling ill health for some time. While both of these deaths were expected, death is never an easy road to travel for those left behind.
Within a week of moving into our new home, I was off to Sydney for just under a week to have my first ever gig as a wedding photographer. While this was exciting, it was also very stressful. Being away from home, from Andy and from Jack so soon after moving in, was really hard and it was the first time I have ever been away on such a short break and really longed for the end.
People have assumed that I will instantly feel at home in our new house, because we are buying it rather than renting it. I have felt a certain pressure to feel a particular way about it, but the honest truth is, I hadn’t felt any of the things about the new house that I am supposed to have felt, and that has made settling very difficult.
After finally finding a weekend to just be, with Andy and Jack, I am starting to feel settled. We went to the farmers markets at Willunga, we walked on the beach, letting Jack run free to chase birds, play in the shallows and hunt for shark eggs, we had a Northern Exposure marathon, I made lasagne. Despite a small matter of a fairly noisy dispute between our neighbours and the police occurring on our front lawn on our otherwise peaceful Sunday night (this gave Jack an opportunity to showcase his skills as a guard dog, and what a guard dog he is!), I am feeling more relaxed and at home.
Roll on Spring, so I can get out and play in my garden!


At least someone feels settled here!
(Gratuitous photo of Jack, I'll take any opportunity!)